Christmas Eve

My Grandpa during WWII

I am sitting in the light of the nine foot Christmas tree in my room.  I have just taken a long hot bath and I am listening to the Mormon Tabernacle Choir sing "Silent Night" as Walter Kronkite tells the story of the Christmas Eve truce. I am missing my grandpa so much I can't see as my eyes fill with tears.  My grandpa Geary died of colon cancer in April of 2000.  In 1995 he was diagnosed.  That Christmas he began to talk about the war.  World War II. He told of Christmas in the foxholes and how for one sweet silent night there was peace in the winter countryside of France.  He fought in the the Battle of the Bulge.  He was forward observer for the 75th Division Cannon Company.  He had never talked about the war before, not to anyone. And suddenly he began to talk.

After The Battle of The Bulge Grandpa helped to liberate Paris

The is Grandpa and his best friend David. My dad is named after him.

Every year after, he would gather us around him and in the light of the Christmas tree he would tell us about the war. Our last Christmas Eve together was in 1999.  Everyone was downstairs opening presents.  I was up in the living room because I had just had my tonsils removed the day before.  Grandpa had just had a tumor removed from his windpipe. We had become very close--he was one of my best friends.  That night he told me that he was afraid to die of suffocation.  The war had instilled in him a fear of creeping gases and being trapped in tight places. He had suffered from asthma his entire life.  He didn't want to struggle for breath.  That night his skin was almost translucent.  Many rounds of chemo had made his body a shrunken husk.  But he was warm and calm and peaceful.  That night he told me that he knew he was going to die.  Then he asked me the impossible. He asked me to sing at his funeral.  I will always remember that Christmas Eve and that is why I miss him so much on this night.

And yet . . .
Death is not the end.  How fitting that this night of nights reminds us that death has no sting.  The grave has no power.  The Son of Righteousness came to save us--with healing in his wings. So now as I watch my niece and nephews in their interminable energy and zest of the season, I know Grandpa is with us.  Families are forever.  "For God so loved the world that He gave His Only Begotten Son."

Happy Christmas.

The Living Christ

As we commemorate the birth of Jesus Christ two

millennia ago, we offer our testimony of the

reality of His matchless life and the infinite

virtue of His great atoning sacrifice. None other has had

so profound an influence upon all who have lived and

will yet live upon the earth.

He was the Great Jehovah of the Old Testament, the

Messiah of the New. Under the direction of His Father,

He was the creator of the earth. “All things were made by

him; and without him was not any thing made that was

made” (John 1:3). Though sinless, He was baptized to 

fulfill all righteousness. He “went about doing good”

(Acts 10:38), yet was despised for it. His gospel was a 

message of peace and goodwill. He entreated all to follow

His example. He walked the roads of Palestine, healing

the sick, causing the blind to see, and raising the dead. He

taught the truths of eternity, the reality of our premortal

existence, the purpose of our life on earth, and the potential

for the sons and daughters of God in the life to come.

He instituted the sacrament as a reminder of His great

atoning sacrifice. He was arrested and condemned on

spurious charges, convicted to satisfy a mob, and sentenced

to die on Calvary’s cross. He gave His life to atone for the

sins of all mankind. His was a great vicarious gift in

behalf of all who would ever live upon the earth.

We solemnly testify that His life, which is central to all

human history, neither began in Bethlehem nor concluded

on Calvary. He was the Firstborn of the Father, the Only

Begotten Son in the flesh, the Redeemer of the world.

He rose from the grave to “become the firstfruits of them

that slept” (1 Corinthians 15:20). As Risen Lord, He visited

among those He had loved in life. He also ministered

among His “other sheep” (John 10:16) in ancient America.

In the modern world, He and His Father appeared to the

boy Joseph Smith, ushering in the long-promised 

“dispensation of the fulness of times” (Ephesians 1:10).

Of the Living Christ, the Prophet Joseph wrote: “His

eyes were as a flame of fire; the hair of his head was white

like the pure snow; his countenance shone above the

brightness of the sun; and his voice was as the sound of the

rushing of great waters, even the voice of Jehovah, saying:

“I am the first and the last; I am he who liveth, I am

he who was slain; I am your advocate with the Father”

(D&C 110:3–4).

Of Him the Prophet also declared: “And now, after the

many testimonies which have been given of him, this is the

testimony, last of all, which we give of him: That he lives!

“For we saw him, even on the right hand of God; and

we heard the voice bearing record that he is the Only

Begotten of the Father—

“That by him, and through him, and of him, the worlds

are and were created, and the inhabitants thereof are

begotten sons and daughters unto God” (D&C 76:22–24).

We declare in words of solemnity that His priesthood

and His Church have been restored upon the earth—

“built upon the foundation of . . . apostles and prophets,

Jesus Christ himself being the chief corner stone”

(Ephesians 2:20).

We testify that He will someday return to earth. “And

the glory of the Lord shall be revealed, and all flesh shall

see it together” (Isaiah 40:5). He will rule as King of

Kings and reign as Lord of Lords, and every knee shall

bend and every tongue shall speak in worship before

Him. Each of us will stand to be judged of Him according

to our works and the desires of our hearts.

We bear testimony, as His duly ordained Apostles—

that Jesus is the Living Christ, the immortal Son of God.

He is the great King Immanuel, who stands today on the

right hand of His Father. He is the light, the life, and the

hope of the world. His way is the path that leads to

happiness in this life and eternal life in the world to come.

God be thanked for the matchless gift of His divine Son.

Truth

"Sometimes, when we lose ourselves in fear and despair, in routine and constancy, in hopelessness and tragedy, we can thank God for Bavarian sugar cookies. And, fortunately, when there aren't any cookies, we can still find reassurance in a familiar hand on our skin, or a kind and loving gesture, or subtle encouragement, or a loving embrace, or an offer of comfort, not to mention hospital gurneys and nose plugs, an uneaten Danish, soft-spoken secrets, and Fender Stratocasters, and maybe the occasional piece of fiction. And we must remember that all these things, the nuances, the anomalies, the subtleties, which we assume only accessorize our days, are effective for a much larger and nobler cause. They are here to save our lives. I know the idea seems strange, but I also know that it just so happens to be true."

Cairns

The clans of Scotland had an ancient tradition that when the men would go off to war each would grab a stone and put it in a pile of other stones: a cairn.  The cairns were reminders to all of those who were fighting and became a symbol of memory, a monument. When the men would come back, each would take his stone back. Those left over were a monument to those who did not come back.  There are cairns in many of the ancient villages of Scotland today. In our time cairns have become markers left by hikers or those who know the trail to show the way to those who come after.

I know about cairns because I lost a good friend of mine last week. He was 38. He has five children 12-2 years in age. He died of annurism of the aorta. He was my neighbor. He was my homeward Bishop. He was a McRae, of the clan McRae and his cousin spoke at his funeral about cairns.

This week I have been faced with mortality. I have lost friends before. Adrienne died of leukemia at age 23. But this one was different. He had a family of his own. He leaves behind more. As I drove through my hometown running errands to keep myself busy, I saw the neighborhood differently. If it were my last day how would it change? I saw the markers of my life.

At the funeral I was able to see friends that I haven't seen since childhood. We were all in shock. A funeral of a young person has a subtle sense of hysteria running through it. "This is not supposed to happen." it screams silently at us. I felt very alone. And then I felt surrounded. It was very strange. A paradox. What cairns do I leave behind. Have I marked the right path with my life? Will I be mourned like that? He lived his life for his family and for others. He lived the right kind of life. I know that he was needed for something pretty important because I can see the important work he left behind undone.

Every so often I think about my life. Am I doing what I am meant to do? Is it time to change something? Something I have control over? I need some new dreams. I need some new conviction to love the world so much that my cairn will count for something.

I miss you Royce.  Your cairn counts for something to me.

Speak, Wrinkle, Genesis

Banned Books make me happy.
People who ban books make me sad/confused/angry/anxious/nervous/speechless/cry.

Some of the most important books in my life are on the banned books list.A Wrinkle in Time by Madeleine L'engle was banned because of the dangerous ideas about an adversary who would take away choice in order to save everyone. There are angels in the book. They talk about God in that book. I LOVE that book.

 Censorship is not okay. I am conservative. I believe in God. I am a teacher. Censorship is not okay. This is Banned Book Week folks. And censorship is rearing its ugly head. Laurie Halse Anderson is an amazing Young Adult Fiction (YAF) writer. She has written books about incredibly hard and scary things. She has written with such tenderness, tact, and compassion. Speak has been targeted, again. Speak has been around for ten years.It is taught in schools, read in book clubs, has receive multiple awards.

 It is about rape.

It is not just about rape. Readers see themselves in Melinda. We become Melinda. Melinda lives inside her head because of what has happened to her. Until she speaks she can't heal. But speaking is so hard. This book sounds exactly like some conversations I have had in my own head. I was not raped. I was assaulted and it affected me in ways that I still am trying to comprehend. I was so afraid to speak, but I had to in order to protect myself and other women. SPEAK. This book has opened doors for conversations from boys and girls about rape and sexual abuse. It is not an easy book. But it is worth it. The uproar comes after an associate professor of management addressed the world as some kind of expert on fiction and said that because the book deals with rape it is soft porn. I hate pornography. Speak is not porn. Scroggins has a right to say what he thinks. That is what is great about America. But some people don't know what he is talking about and will believe him. Parents get worried and want to protect their kids. That is their right. Banning books is not right though. I know what is right and wrong because of a banned book. THE BIBLE.

This is intensely worrying to me. There are books that I hate. I think some of them are filth. There are books that I choose not to read. Banning is not the answer. I read banned books.


 This is straight from Laurie's blog:

This guy thinks SPEAK is pornography

By LAURIE | Published: SEPTEMBER 19, 2010

Remember last September, when the book banners crawled out of their pits of nastiness to try to remove YA literature from classrooms and libraries?

It is September again, my friends.

Wesley Scroggins is an associate professor of management at Missouri State University. He was also a speaker at Reclaiming Missouri for Christ, a recent seminar whose purpose was to “To educate our pastors, legislators, educators, students, and all citizens as to the truth about America’s Christian Heritage and the role of fundamental, Biblical Christianity in the establishment and function of our legal, legislative, and educational system, and to work towards the successful reestablishment of these values in our society.”

(Note: I love Jesus. My dad is a United Methodist minister. I point out Scroggins’ affiliation with this group so readers can understand his larger agenda.)

Wesley wrote an opinion piece in the News-Leader of Springfield, MO, in which he characterized SPEAK as filthy and immoral. Then he called it “soft pornography” because of two rape scenes.

The fact that he sees rape as sexually exciting (pornographic) is disturbing, if not horrifying. It gets worse, if that’s possible, when he goes on to completely mischaracterize the book.

Some people say that I shouldn’t make a big deal about this. That I am giving him more attention than he deserves. But this guy lives about an hour and half from the school district that banned Sherman Alexie’s THE ABSOLUTELY TRUE DIARY OF A PART-TIME INDIAN this month.

My fear is that good-hearted people in Scroggins’ community will read his piece and believe what he says. And then they will complain to the school board. And then the book will be pulled and then all those kids who might have found truth and support in the book will be denied that. In addition, all the kids who have healthy emotional lives but who hate reading, will miss the chance to enjoy a book that might change their opinion.

All because some wingnut grabbed the opinion page of his newspaper, bellowed his lies, and no one challenged him.

I have already received incredible support on Facebook and in my inbox. Paul Hankins, an English teacher from Indiana, has started a Twitterfeed -  #SpeakLoudly  – where people can tweet their opinions. And my hero, Judy Blume, wrote to say she is bringing this nonsense to the attention of the National Council Against Censorship.

(I must confess – receiving a message from Judy Blume made me shriek a little. I am such a fangrrl of hers.)

I love the support from the blogosphere, but am concerned that the people in Scroggins’ community who might be swayed by his nonsense are not reading those blogs or following Twitter feeds on the topic. So I am writing to the school district superintendent and to the newspaper. But I know (because I’ve been here before) that my comments will likely be greeted with scepticism because I have a vested interest in the process.

I need your help.

Please share your experiences with SPEAK; your own response to the book, or the way you’ve seen it work in a school setting. Tahleen has already posted her thoughts on her blog. You can do the same. Please share links to your blog in Comments.

But then, please speak up to the people who can make a real difference in Republic, MO.

You can submit a letter to the editor of the News-Leader.

You can write to the superintendent of the Republic School District, Dr. Vern Minor, or to the high school principal, Daren Harris.

You can comment directly to Scroggins’ opinion piece.

This is from Newberry Winner and YAF Guru Shannon Hale's Blog:

Speak loudly

Still pregnant! Sorry I didn't post yesterday. I guess I was taking a day of rest.

I am in no uncertain terms shocked and disgusted by a recent challenge to a young adult book. Sometimes with challenged books I can sort of see their point, even if I don't agree. This instance is just so wrong, I want to SPEAK up about it.

In an opinion piece in a Missouri newspaper, a university associate professor challenges three books read in local high school English classes. I haven't read the other two so won't chime in on those ones, but one of them is Speak by Laurie Halse Anderson, a book I admire tremendously. It is gorgeously crafted, smart, and powerful. The most shocking part is he says it should "be classified as soft core pornography."

Oh my. Have we come to this? Will people really listen to this guy? An editor's note at the end of the article says that the other two books he mentioned have already been pulled or are under review.  Let me clarify for those of you who haven't read Speak: it's about rape. A high school girl is raped. Rape, people. Pornography is "designed to stimulate sexual excitement." I am extremely sensitive to depictions of rape. I have turned off movies and put down books that even remotely crossed the line for me. Speak was not one of those. It's not graphic, it is definitely not designed to titillate. It is honest while being respectful. If someone reads that book and is stimulated by it, then they should SEE A THERAPIST.

This might be funny if it weren't so tragic and dangerous. This attitude is precisely what keeps girls silent when they should be speaking up, what makes them afraid of reporting rape, what lets perpetrators get away. Please, please don't confuse the issue. Rape is rape is rape. It is not sex. It is not sexy. It is violence. It is always wrong. Classifying this book as a kind of pornography is so insulting and damaging to survivors of rape. Ee gads. I'm so upset I'm contracting just thinking about it. Deep breaths, Mama.

As is so often the case, protests against books say more about the protester than the book. I'm keenly aware of this whenever I can't stand a book that others adore. What does that say about me? What am I expecting, hoping for? Reading is such great self-examination. I wonder if this professor will be conducting any self-examination. I wonder what he'll discover about himself. I wonder if he'll get help.

Veronica Roth had an interesting Christian response to this, as the book banner is a Christian, and also links to other blog posts if you're interested.

This is from Lena Roy's blog. She is the granddaughter of Madeleine L'engle and a YAF writer with a new book due out in December.

Dear Oprah: Speak out for SPEAK

Cover of Speak

Dear Oprah,

I am writing to you again in the hopes that you will do something on your show to highlight BANNED BOOKS WEEK, next week starting September 25th.

This is a week that "librarians, teachers, and booksellers across the country use Banned Books Week each year to teach the importance of our First Amendment rights and the power of literature, and to draw attention to the danger that exists when restraints are imposed on the availability of information in a free society."

Laurie Halse Anderson would make a wonderful guest. Her groundbreaking novel, SPEAK, has just been attacked by a professor in Missouri, calling it "soft pornography" because of two rape scenes. Anderson handles this issue with such heartbreaking sensitivity that I find the accusation absolutely ludicrous. The whole point of SPEAK is to encourage people to speak out when the "unspeakable" happens. Because it does happen.

What would happen if we didn't have books that explored and tackled the tough issues teens and kids face? What kind of world would we live in if we didn't have the freedom to read and make choices?

I thought that this book and topic might interest you in particular because of your open-ness and struggles with sexual abuse - losing your voice and then finding it.

Thank you for considering this.

Yours truly,

Léna Roy

Read a banned book. Think about censorship. Do something. 

PS: My dearest friend is writing a book about sexual abuse. It is for Young Adults. I know she will have really made a difference when her book is on the Banned Book List.