Gratitude

The last few days. . . I tell you, they have been hard. But one of the wonderful things has been that almost miraculously, this beautiful gift came with all of the monsters and darkness.

Gratitude.

Thankfulness.

In everyone's life, at some time, our inner fire goes out. It is then burst into flame by an encounter with another human being. We should all be thankful for those people who rekindle the inner spirit.
~Albert Schweitzer

Oh, there are so many things to be thankful for. So many people. So many rekindlers. Oh, where to start.

I am thankful for:
warm beds
food after a long day at church
my job
beautiful art that kindles my soul
My family: immediate and extended. They are there for me immediately. They extend their love around me and help me to remember who I am, encourage me that who I am is a good person to be. They affirm my personality. They help me to be silly. My brother keeps me from being too serious about myself. Mom, Dad, Brooke, Aaron, Rylie, Mason, Bracken. . . I started to list you all and the post was miles long. Just know that I am so thankful for you.
Snowflakes, real and paper
dogs
Joseph Smith
The Scriptures
The Restoration
Music
Knowing God
The Atonement of Jesus Christ
Knowing who I am and who I am meant to be
Blue goggles
My students
Tiaras
Sparkly fairy wings
Roses
Stars
Castles
Books
hooded sweatshirts
etc.
I have been thinking of two songs in particular that say what I feel
Thankful by Josh Groban
and Grateful by John Bucchino

Thankful

Sometimes we forget
The joy that surrounds us
So caught up inside ourselves
We take when we should give.

So for tonight we pray for
What we know can be.
And on this day we hope for
What we still can't see.
It's up to us to be the change
And even though we all can still do more
There's so much to be thankful for.

Look beyond ourselves
There's so much sorrow
It's way too late to say
I'll cry tomorrow
Each of us must find our truth
It's so long overdue

So for tonight we pray for
What we know can be
And every day we hope for
What we still can't see
It's up to us to be the change
And even though we all can still do more
There's so much to be thankful for.
Even with our differences
There is a place we're all connected
Each of us can find each other's light

So for tonight we pray for
What we know can be
And on this day we hope for
What we still can't see
It's up to us to be the change
And even though this world needs so much more
There's so much to be thankful for

I've got a roof over my head
I've got a warm place to sleep
Some nights I lie awake counting gifts
Instead of counting sheep
I've got a heart that can hold love
I've got a mind that can think
There may be times when I lose the light
And let my spirits sink
But I can't stay depressed
When I remember how I'm blessed

Grateful, grateful
Truly grateful I am
Grateful, grateful
Truly blessed
And duly grateful

In a city of strangers
I've got a family of friends
No matter what rocks and brambles fill the way
I know that they will stay in the end
I feel a hand holding my hand
It's not a hand you can see
But on the road to the promised land
This hand will shepherd me
Through delight and despair
Holding tight and always there
Grateful, grateful
Truly grateful I am
Grateful, grateful
Truly blessed
And duly grateful

It's not that I don't want a lot
Or hope for more, or dream of more
But giving thanks for what I've got
Makes me so much happier than keeping score
In a world that can bring pain
I will still take each chance
For I believe that whatever the terrain
Our feet can learn to dance
Whatever stone life may sling
We can moan or we can sing
Grateful, grateful
Truly grateful I am
Grateful, grateful
Truly blessed
And duly grateful

Fast Sunday

I was able to go to Sacrament Meeting today. I didn't make it to all of church, my injuries are still getting in the way. A week ago Wednesday I was driving home from work on University Parkway. It had already been a tough day full of frustrations. I had stopped at Coldstone for some chocolate therapy and was headed home. In the right hand shoulder lane there was a three car pile up. I gave it some distance and moved on to the stop light that had just turned red. I glanced in my rear view mirror, as I am apt to do when stopped at a light and noticed that the lady in the car behind me was not facing forward but was watching the accident. Suddenly she hit me, without slowing down, without warning even. I immediately felt sharp pain in my neck and spine. The front of her vehicle was mashed, luckily my car sustained only minor damage, but I sustained the real damage. I wasn't able to get into my doctor until Friday. After talking with my parents we decided that I should get a blessing to get me through until I could go to Dr. Frazier. I have amazing hometeachers and friends who I can call upon at a moments notice. My dear hometeacher and friend Chase had a cold and so I warned him that I needed a blessing but that he was in quarantine because I get sick so easily. Bryce my friend and Elder's quorum president came over and his first couselor Brandon, who is our friend and my roommate Pam's boyfriend. He was followed by my other hometeacher Jeremy. They gave me a lovely blessing that sustained me through the next day until I could get to the doctor, where it was discovered that I had serious whiplash and nerve damage in my neck and shoulder. It took another week before X-rays confirmed the damage. I am feeling better now that they have found an appropriate pain med and muscle relaxant for me to take. But teaching and then Halloween and not seeing my doctor for a few days all piled up and today was very uncomfortable. I knew I needed the sacrament, I needed that reminder that as long as there is a Savior and I have access to the priesthood everything will be okay. By mid meeting my neck had started spasms and my upperback was screaming at me. Though I was not able to bear my testimony at church, I wanted to bear it here. This is my testimony.

I know that when bad things happen, the Lord always sends good things to compensate his worthy disciples. Because of the Atonement and desire to believe all can qualify for this compensation through looking to God, having faith in his Son--the Redeemer of us all--and believing in His promises. The Lord has sent amazing people to take care of me, my roommates, my friends, my leaders, family. Even when I am far away from home I am surrounded by love. Life is about learning to do hard things. But because of the Atonement, we are not alone in doing those hard things. The Savior is always there to raise us up, to walk with us, and yes to carry us when we cannot walk. This is hard, but I know that I can do it, because Jesus makes it so.